I've graduated, turned a year older, it was a double slap in the face from reality.
and the week ended last night with a guy peeing on me.
Or i think he did. I was on a street corner somewhere in the east village, kind of lost, and my dress kept blowing out from me. I felt wetness on the front of my dress, rain? water? spit? I look over, and there's a guy zipping up saying, "Ohhh sorry. looks like you peed yourself haha."
And I was so under the influence that for a few minutes I thought I did. I started crying, was I one of those girls? It was like I was in kindergarten again looking at the little girl wearing the telltale polyester shorts the school kept for that purpose.
I ran, dripping randomly at intervals. Tried to dry myself by running. It was so cold, and I'd stop and catch my breath, but couldn't smell anything. Maybe it hadn't really happened. Maybe it was a sign from God, Run, run your life so you can dry off when things piss on you.
When I got home I scrubbed myself off and went over it again in my head. I went to sleep feeling reassured, no it hadn't happened. Maybe it's all the power of revisionist memory, but it was just water or alcohol... it hadn't been warm, and I don't know how someone could really aim that far. Bah.
Anyway, I started this cause I wanted something new, and it seems easier than xanga. I'll try to be good about it and write everyday... hopefully no more stories like the one above. It's disjointed because I'm still hungover.
Graduation made me a little depressed, no more chances to turn in a paper on time, revise my gpa. It's done, get to start over.